Glamorous

When I was little I always hoped that when I grew up I would be tall, thin and glamorous. I would have shiney long hair and fashionable clothes. Either that or I wanted to be petite and cute (which made more sense since I was tiny as a kid, always the smallest). Instead I ended up in between. Awesome. My legs are petite which my butt is a normal size leaning towards badonkadonk and my torso is long and tall. Nothing fits properly. Especially not trendy clothes. I walk more like a little kid (somewhere inbetween a skip and a waddle) then a fashion model. I am definitely more of a goon then a fashionista.

But maybe its for the best because I am sure I would have to be dreadfully serious and somewhat bitchy. I would not be allowed to laugh at farts or call people poop mouths. I would have never been able to play sports(as terrible at them as I was). I would never even consider sending porn to my friends in Iraq much less be friends with them ( I would have never tried to join the Army in the first place). There would be no wrestling with my bf, or chugging contests. I could never eat or love food like I do, or drink like I did.And just think of all the fun I would miss out on if I wasn't such a klutz. No falling, spilling, slipping, tripping, dropping food on myself; it would be ridiculously dull to hang out with me. I would never be funny since I am only funny on accident(I can pretend they laugh with me).

Don't get me wrong I am still a girl and I wouldn't want to be anything else (man, mermaid, centuar, picture frame etc). I throw things terribly since I have absolutely no aim. I like makeup and jewelry, clothes and pretty shoes. I have no clue about cars or electronics nor do I have any desire to learn further. I sing in mezzo, I love to dance, I like drinking fruity drinks, and running terribly slow. But I was always seem a bit immature a lot younger then I am (my looks don't help with that one). Instead of glamorous I am a self proclaimed goof.